Embracing Courage in Midlife: Unleashing Your True Self

Lately, I’ve been contemplating what it means to be courageous in life after fifty. This theme often resurfaces for me during times of significant change or when I need to summon inner strength. Preparing for an interview on the Courageous Me podcast recently prompted me to rethink my understanding of courage. In this blog, I share my insights on courage, its importance, and strategies for navigating career and life transitions after fifty.

Redefining Courage and Bravery

Throughout my life, I’ve often equated courage with bravery—bold decisions, daring moves, and grand gestures. While courage and bravery both involve facing fear and challenges, I’ve come to see that courage is a deeper, more sustained quality requiring awareness and reflection. Courage is the inner strength that pushes us beyond our comfort zone, enabling us to take risks, make difficult decisions, and pursue our dreams. Unlike bravery, which is about confronting immediate dangers with quick reactions, courage involves a deliberate connection with our true selves and a commitment to authenticity.

Courage as ‘The Measure of Our Heartfelt Participation’

In my exploration of courage, I discovered poet David Whyte’s words:

“Courage is the measure of our heartfelt participation with life, with another, with a community, a work; a future.”

These words resonate deeply with me, emphasising courage is about wholehearted engagement with all aspects of life. For women, this heartfelt participation is crucial. It’s about showing up fully in our lives, embracing our passions, and engaging meaningfully with our communities and futures. Whyte further explains:

“To be courageous is not necessarily to go anywhere or do anything except to make conscious those things we already feel deeply and then to live through the unending vulnerabilities of those consequences.”

This perspective shifted my understanding of courage. I realised that it's about recognising who you are, understanding what’s important to you, and acting on that knowledge. I’ve faced this challenge myself, particularly in 2021, when I realised my long-established career no longer fulfilled me. Amid the pandemic’s isolation, I felt despair and uncertainty about my future.

The only way forward was to look inward: Why was I feeling this way? What needed to change? What else could I pursue? This introspective process involved setting aside preconceived notions about my career path and ageist beliefs about what was possible for a woman my age. By removing external expectations, I prioritised my happiness and passions, creating my own narrative for my life.

This was just the beginning. I then had to act on my new self-knowledge and live through the vulnerabilities of these decisions. That’s exactly what I’ve been doing ever since, and here are a few of the many valuable lessons I have taken from my experience.

It Is Vital To Reconnect With Your Inner Self

Midlife is a time of significant change, and this means it is especially important to reconnect with yourself, with your inner self, and listen to your heart and soul. The alternative is what Brene Brown describes as ‘a slow, brutal unravelling’.

What are your true desires? What passions have you neglected? What dreams have you deferred? This phase of life offers a unique opportunity to rediscover and nurture these aspects of yourself.

Reflect on what truly matters to you. What do you want to achieve in this next chapter of your life? What legacy do you want to leave behind? By connecting with your inner self, you can create a vision for your future that resonates deeply with your true values and aspirations.

Engaging Fully With Your Life Makes The Difference

If courage involves heartfelt participation in life, this means showing up authentically in all areas of your life. It might mean setting boundaries, saying no to what no longer aligns with your values, and saying yes to new opportunities that resonate with your true self.

For women over fifty, this can mean pursuing new career opportunities, volunteering in your community, or deepening relationships with loved ones. Whatever path you choose, the key is to engage fully and authentically, embracing both the joys and the challenges that come with it.

Now Is The Time To Overcome Self-Doubt

Self-doubt often accompanies career and life transitions. You may question your abilities, worry about starting over, or fear failure. However, the knowledge that you are moving towards your deeply held desires will be your guiding force. Use this to silence doubts and pursue your goals with unwavering determination. Trust your capabilities, embrace your worth, and find the strength to persevere. You’ll find you’re better equipped to pursue what truly matters to you.

Taking Small, Intentional Steps Will Get You There

Courage can be found in small, intentional steps. You don’t need to make drastic changes overnight. Start with actions that move you towards your goals. Celebrate each step forward, no matter how small, and recognize that every step is a testament to your courage.

Perhaps you’ve always wanted to start your own business. Begin by researching the field, networking with like-minded women, and developing a business plan. Or maybe you’ve dreamed of writing a book. Start by dedicating a small amount of time each day to writing, even if it’s just a few paragraphs. I started with a 90-day plan, where I committed an hour a day for 90 days to exploring options. If retirement is coming, commit to exploring life beyond work and start making changes now.

Know that you will make mistakes and be willing to keep going. As Mary Anne Radmacher said, “Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, 'I will try again tomorrow.'"

Seeking Support Enables Action

Navigating midlife transitions can be challenging, and it’s important to seek support. Connect with other women who are going through similar experiences. Consider working with a coach who can provide guidance and encouragement as you navigate this journey.

Surround yourself with a supportive community that understands and values your journey. Whether it’s a group of friends, a professional network, or a mentor, having a support system can provide the encouragement and motivation you need to stay courageous and committed to your path.

Trusting the Process Helps

Trust that embracing your true self is a worthwhile journey. It may sometimes be uncomfortable and challenging, but it is also incredibly rewarding. Trust that you have the strength and resilience to navigate this transition and to emerge stronger and more authentic.

Remember, courage is not the absence of fear but the willingness to move forward despite it. It’s about living through the unending vulnerabilities of our choices and embracing the uncertainties that come with change. Trust yourself and the journey, knowing that every step you take brings you closer to a more fulfilling and authentic life.

Courage Will Empower Your Midlife Journey

Midlife is not a crisis but an invitation to reclaim your true self and to live more authentically and courageously. It is time to let go of what no longer serves you and embrace the possibilities that lie ahead. Courage will help you face the changes that lie ahead and create a future that resonates with your true self. Embrace this journey with an open heart, knowing that you are not alone and that every step you take is a step towards a more fulfilling and authentic life.

Available now:

Listen to the interview with me on the Courageous Me podcast.

Learn more about my coaching services.

Book a time to discuss how coaching can support you.